I have been hard-pressed fo find a name for how I feel about what I went through in this last relationship. I had been using the word sad, but that didn’t feel quite right. Angry yes, but I know anger is just a broad word we use for many emotions. Angry by itself just didn’tContinue reading “Identifying Emotions”
Category Archives: infidelity
Fifty
Tomorrow is my fiftieth birthday. I don’t know how it got here so fast. There were supposed to be big plans, a trip, but all that fell apart. My friends got busy, my relationship ended, and I discovered he’s a narcissist. Definitely not the birthday I had thought it would be. Even with the disappointments,Continue reading “Fifty”
Lessons I’ve Learned Part 2
I have worked hard and been through a lot of pain and tears to learn these lessons. I have had to let go of a lot of my own control issues and the attachment I had to each partner. I’m still working on the attachment with the most recent one. He was the covert narcissistContinue reading “Lessons I’ve Learned Part 2”
Healing 2.0
As I sit here doing my favorite fall Sunday activity (watching my Cowboys play), I have been struggling. These past weeks have involved a lot of unpacking the baggage in my life, some baggage I didn’t even realize I had until the ending of my recent relationship. I did so much work after my ex’sContinue reading “Healing 2.0”
Gratitude List
I know I’ve written before about keeping a gratitude list, but I’ve recently changed the way I approach it. I struggle with feeling like the things I am thankful for should be big and important. Like my boys or the fact that I grew up with two wonderful parents. I often forget to be thankfulContinue reading “Gratitude List”
My Redemption Story
Since 2015, my story has been one of emotional abuse, cheating, physical intimidation, lies, manipulation, criticism, divorce- it’s been a long list. But that is not my story. My story is not what I went through. My story is not who I was. My story is who I am now and who I will be. Continue reading “My Redemption Story”
Joy Comes in the Morning
In just two days, my youngest will graduate high school. I don’t know how he went from my baby to a young man so fast. I keep joking that I’m not okay, but it’s true. I am not okay. These past few weeks have been very emotionally draining. There were so many lasts- the lastContinue reading “Joy Comes in the Morning”
I’m Not Okay
Yesterday I got to hear my youngest son play in the District Honors Band. This is his senior year, so it seems like everything he does is the last time. One of the songs was so moving, it had me in tears. Sitting there alone, yet surrounded by so many people, I nearly started sobbing. IContinue reading “I’m Not Okay”
Thanksgiving
I began my journey of attempting to be more grateful during the middle of my Celebrate Recovery step study about a year ago. Whenever I begin to feel down about what I’ve lost, missed out on, or never had, I just think of my small group leader reminding me to turn to my Gratitude List. Continue reading “Thanksgiving”
Sabotaging the Good
In my Celebrate Recovery group, we talked a lot about how working through our issues is like peeling an onion. You peel away one layer and there’s another underneath it to work through. I know that this self-doubt I have that causes my lack of trust is a very big layer for me. I wasn’tContinue reading “Sabotaging the Good”
Finding The Good 