amyc321

Fifty

Tomorrow is my fiftieth birthday. I don’t know how it got here so fast. There were supposed to be big plans, a trip, but all that fell apart. My friends got busy, my relationship ended, and I discovered he’s a narcissist. Definitely not the birthday I had thought it would be. Even with the disappointments,Continue reading “Fifty”

Lessons I’ve Learned Part 2

I have worked hard and been through a lot of pain and tears to learn these lessons. I have had to let go of a lot of my own control issues and the attachment I had to each partner. I’m still working on the attachment with the most recent one. He was the covert narcissistContinue reading “Lessons I’ve Learned Part 2”

Lessons I’ve Learned Part 1

I went to the Smokey Mountains last weekend. I needed to get away from here and have some space and time to think and spend time with God. I have struggled so much with the realization that I had been the target of a narcissist, two of them. I finally took some time to goContinue reading “Lessons I’ve Learned Part 1”

Healing 2.0

As I sit here doing my favorite fall Sunday activity (watching my Cowboys play), I have been struggling. These past weeks have involved a lot of unpacking the baggage in my life, some baggage I didn’t even realize I had until the ending of my recent relationship. I did so much work after my ex’sContinue reading “Healing 2.0”

My Testimony

My life has been an emotional roller coaster for the past couple months. I’m not yet ready, not sure if I will ever be ready, to share all that has been going on, but I do want to talk about all I have learned in the process of all the hurt and pain. I’ve alwaysContinue reading “My Testimony”

Love and Loss

Loss: the fact or process of losing something or someone. I don’t know what else to do except write. I have a hard time vocalizing how I feel and writing is sometimes the only way I can get it out. My family lost one of our most precious members last week. She was kind, beautiful,Continue reading “Love and Loss”

It’s me

UPDATE: I wrote this post before I realized that the man I had been dating was actually a covert narcissist. He was cheating on me and extremely emotionally abusive during this time. When I go back and read this, I realize that my body was telling me to run because it knew I was inContinue reading “It’s me”

Gratitude List

I know I’ve written before about keeping a gratitude list, but I’ve recently changed the way I approach it. I struggle with feeling like the things I am thankful for should be big and important. Like my boys or the fact that I grew up with two wonderful parents. I often forget to be thankfulContinue reading “Gratitude List”

The Search for Truly Living

We live in a world that glorifies immediate gratification, pride, opportunistic behaviors, and perceived perfection. We want a job that makes us a lot of money right out of college. We want our packages tomorrow, or even today. We want to be respected and acknowledged for every good deed or work we have done. WeContinue reading “The Search for Truly Living”

My Redemption Story

Since 2015, my story has been one of emotional abuse, cheating, physical intimidation, lies, manipulation, criticism, divorce- it’s been a long list. But that is not my story. My story is not what I went through. My story is not who I was. My story is who I am now and who I will be. Continue reading “My Redemption Story”